Monday, October 27, 2008


This morning I woke up, got out of bed, shuffled into the bathroom took off my glasses, and washed my face. I leaned over to the towel rack and patted my face dry, opened my eyes, and saw one of THESE LITTLE FUCKERS on the wall 3" from my face. Tried to not scream as it was only 6:45 and I didn't want to freak my neighbors out. Ran into the living room, grabbed a shoe, and smooshed it dead. I was off to an energetic start. The adrenaline was really pumping!

On the drive in to work I nearly creamed a small flock of wild turkeys. Now I'm not saying that I live right in the city or anything, it's really more suburbs, but I didn't expect to come across turkeys somewhere between an interstate and an airport. They're big ugly birds. And dumber than you'd imagine- two of them saw me coming, wandered out of the road, and then wandered back into the road. I can't imagine that they have a really well developed memory or anything, but come on. An object about 400 times bigger than you is coming towards you and you decide to stand in front of it and LOOK at it? Wow. I should have run over one for Thanksgiving dinner.

A few minutes later I was in my office park and I looked over and saw a deer just hanging out on the side of the road. There really wasn't much traffic so she seemed pretty docile, but I this is Tennessee so I was afraid some redneck was going to jump out of the trees and shoot her. That would NOT have been a good start to the morning so I'm glad that didn't happen.

When I got home this evening there was another bug crawling across my living room floor. I'm not sure what this was- it had wings and it was quickly dispatched to the great bug zapper in the sky. That's the great thing about not having the heat on yet (it was 60 degrees in my apt this morning)- the bugs are slow. However, when it is cold outside they really like to come INSIDE and get warm so in the morning I will be on FULL BUG ALERT. Because it will be 32 degrees tonight and I finally succumbed and turned on the heat.

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